I have been horribly remiss about posting. Things in my world have been slightly off kilter. Almost normal, but not. For one thing, I still don’t know who won the Oscars. And I am a die-hard Oscar fan.
What I mean to say is that I’m a die-hard movie fan, but the Oscars are probably the most important night of the whole year for me. And the morning the nominations are announced is probably the most important morning of the whole year for me.
By that time, I’ve more or less seen the films I want to see and the remaining weeks until the ceremony are spent catching up on the handful I missed – as well as seeing the ones I really am not interested in but have to see because they were nominated. If I’m really busy, as I was this year, it becomes almost like work. Sometimes I don’t even enjoy it.
About two weeks before ‘the’ event, I found out that I had to be away, far away with no Oscar access. And apparently Time Warner doesn’t let you set your DVR that far in advance. Missing the show was all I could think about. Well that and flying coach, but nothing else.
Then, just like a cheesy movie plot, shortly before I was to leave, someone kind of amazing came into my life. Someone who seemed as crazy about the Oscars as I. He seemed, then at least, amazing for lots of reasons. It was an extremely finite period of amazingness, but that wasn’t apparent till later. Back then, it was an intoxicating combination of someone who was super interesting, a good kisser and who would DVR the Oscars for me. Ooooh, that’s a bingo!
The cheesy movie plot continued. I received an apologetic email the day after the show. He didn’t tape it. I mentioned this to a guy I was with in Faraway Land. “I don’t know…if I liked you, I would have made sure I taped it. That’s kind of what you do.” I tried to ignore that.
What I couldn’t ignore was that I didn’t have the Oscars telecast. I didn’t want a list of the winners. I didn’t want to watch a clip of the Best Picture or Best Actor awards. I wanted every minute, including the songs and the Irving R. Thalberg Tribute. I even wanted the at-last-week’s-luncheon-we-gave-the-Technical-Awards speech.
I wanted my best night of the year.
I called my friend, Phillip. He loves the Oscars; he would have taped it. “Oh, sorry, I only have the Red Carpet.” I looked online, all over. I called everyone I knew. No one had the entire show. So I waited. I’d have to find it somehow. I didn’t want the news any other way.
I didn’t use my computer for well over a week. I was with only a few people and, they, thankfully, respected my craziness and never spoke of the show or its winners. I didn’t read any newspapers or turn on the television.
By the time I got home a couple of weeks later, the headlines had moved on. I told my neighbor to make sure all my magazines were face down when she gave me my mail. They’re still sitting that way in my living room.
Mr. Amazing was gone. In his place was Mr. Indifferent. He wasn’t nearly as fun to spend time with. Or at least I’m guessing he wouldn’t have been; I never saw much of him. The cheesy movie plot never developed, not even in a straight-to-DVD fashion.
42 days later and I still don’t know who won. Should I just read the list of winners already and give up trying to find the real thing? It’s kind of ridiculous that I still hold out hope that I’ll find someone who taped the show, still has it saved, and will let me come over and watch it. In silence of course. I like my Oscar experience pure. It’s also kind of ridiculous that I think about that teensy amount of Mr. Amazing time more than the vast amount of Mr. Indifferent time.
I’ve had my Academy acceptance speech written for years. I’m on stage. I look at Oscar and then I look to camera.
“Mommy…(pause)….I finally met the man of my dreams.”